Gossips

In India around 350 BC in Magadh, Chanakya was widely lauded for his wisdom.

One day an acquaintance ran up to him excitedly and said, "Chanakya ji, do you know what I just heard about Pandit Haridas ?"

"Wait a moment," Chanakya replied, "Before you tell me I'd like you to pass a little test. It's called the Triple Filter Test."

'Triple filter?" asked the acquaintance.

"That's right," Chanakya continued, "Before you talk to me about Pandit Haridas, let's take a moment to filter what you're going to say.

"The first filter is Truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?"

"No," the man said, "Actually I just heard about it."

"All right," said Chanakya, "So you don't really know if it's true or not."

"Now let's try the second filter, the filter of Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about Pandit Haridas something good?"

"No, on the contrary..."

"So," Chanakya continued, "You want to tell me something about Pandit Haridas that may be bad, even though you're not certain it's true?"

The man shrugged, a little embarrassed. Chanakya continued, "You may still pass the test though, because there is a third filter, the filter of Usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about Pandit Haridas going to be useful to me?"

"No, not really."

"Well," concluded Chanakya, "If what you want to tell me is neither True nor Good nor even useful, why tell it to me or anyone at all?"

The man was bewildered and ashamed. This is an example of why Chanakya was a great politician and held in such high esteem.

Moral of the story: "Whoever gossips to you will gossip about you" - A Spanish Proverb

Thank you for smoking !!

No Smoking, alcohol prohibition, all such words were crap for me before one year. I was one of those who use to say: "Smoking is the sign of a man", "stud always smokes", “Smoking relieves stress”, “Management or software people are identified with habit of smoking”.

Not only smoking, I would have mentioned about many such quotes about alcohol and other addiction I have taken proud of in the past. But that was not as frequent as smoking. so i wont mention them. But consider smoking as stereotype for all type of addictions for time being.

You might be wondering why today somehow out of blue, I write on addiction. Believe me this is not all of sudden. It is truly said that you can’t escape from your past. I gave up smoking before a year and now hope not to go on that path again. This purification has not come from any excellent speech of a preacher but due to many incidents in my life. I never wanted to share those incidents as people who were involved are close to me. But I decided to write with a hope that they would understand sooner or later and may learn from those incidents.

The first time I felt pity on myself due to smoking was a friends-meet at KITLI before almost a year. I used to roam around in night like a nocturnal scavenger. Most of the highway KITLI owners knew me by my face as I frequently visited them to have tea and smoke at different KITLI. One of my friend, Jigs, one night, called me to join him for tea at 11 pm at regular KITLI place. When I reached there and saw that he was with his kids. I never met them before. Both were innocent and sweet. I decided to not to smoke in front of them; just ordered tea for me and my friend. I took my seat after having few funny words with kids. Their presence made me smile but it vanished in a little while.

The moment tea had been served; Jigs took a cigarette out from his cigar box and lit up. My eyes went wider. His act was really deplorable.

“Take it easy Jay!! They know that I smoke.” Jigs offered me a puff

“Whatever!! you carry on I won’t have it” I refused.

He continued laughing at me and I did not mind it. But what made me uncomfortable was his next puff which reached his daughter’s face. She coughed a little bit.

“You can go and wait in car if you don’t bare it.” Jigs asked her daughter.

But she was helpless as she afraid of sitting alone in car. I was lost in observing reactions of both Jigs and his daughter. She continuously starred at me. She did not have tears in her eye but I could see her crying and begging for help. I was totally numb. I could not speak or do anything for her. First time, in my entire life, someone made feel ashamed. I left the place after finishing my tea but I could not forget the way she stared at me, not even today. Whenever I see Jigs smoking, I feel like slapping him hard. I see only those helpless eyes of his daughter and pray god to make him see the consequences of his actions.

Even if I take my own case, my father is a very strict person. He always discourages such action by any person. He can’t tolerate that he advices everyone and his son does not follow him. Because of my addiction, I had to lie to my parents. Moreover I never preferred to go out with my father to tea stall or to nearby pan parlor to buy anything as I afraid whether someone will offer me a smoke and I would be caught.

I have seen distance being created between family members. One of my friends could not control on alcohol. Whenever he gets over drunk, he beats his wife and kids. Usual na ? being neighbour or friends, we had seen such things atleast once in our life. But what do we do? Keep quit, gossip around, and follow the same path in future. You may want to argue that you are not like him. I do appreciate.

Whenever I see any protests against such addiction, I somewhere down in my heart know what are its consequences. I never understand what makes us so brutal and wild.

It is not only you who pay for your mistakes but also your family and well wishers. Life does not give everyone an opportunity to change.

Never again - Learn From Master

This story is about living legend, god of cricket, Sachin Tendulkar.

In 2007, Aus toured Ind. During one day series in the tour, Brad Hogg took sachin's wicket in 5th ODI. After match ended, he went to sachin with a ball to get an autograph. Sachin gently signed it with a note written below his signature "It wont happen again". After that day, Sachin faced Brad Hogg in 21 matches but Brad Hogg could not get his wicket again.

This is what was published in new of the famous newspaper of culcutta "The Telegraph" on 23rd Dec, 2007.

-- X --

Sachin Tendulkar has given it in writing that Brad Hogg would never get his wicket again, the Australian spinner said on Saturday.

Hogg had scalped Sachin in the October 5 one-day International in Hyderabad.

“I got him out in one of the games, and there was a photo of it I asked him to sign for me. He did it and wrote me a message. Underneath his signature, he wrote, ‘this will never happen again, Hoggy,’” Hogg told a newspaper.

“It’s a bit of a prized possession.”
-- X --

Morale of the story: Be as committed as Sachin in your respective fields. and never repeat your mistake!

For those who don't believe or need a proof to read please read this newspaper.
I hope you must have heard of the newspaper

Reference: http://www.telegraphindia.com/1071223/jsp/sports/story_8700843.jsp

Don't Cry Over Spilt Milk

From last couple of months, I could not write anything. I really did not get what to write and how to start with. But fortunately or unfortunately I came across an incident which made me write this article.

Recently my brother met with an accident and broke his shoulder. He had to be operated as the two cracked parts of bone was not in touch. Doctor put two wires inside to support the contact of those two parts. The matter was little serious as he was operated otherwise the operation or the injury was easily curable.

It was my responsibility to inform everyone about his accident. But this role made me remember some pained points of mine which I faced when I was injured badly. When I was injured, the difficult task was to listen to elders and those talented people surrounding me who never met with an accident or saved from major injuries.

"How careless you are !!"

"Can't you just drive slow?"

"Can't you see the vehicle crossing your way?"

"How irresponsible you are"

This type of remarks were really a demotivating factor especially for the person who is just saved from a fatal accident. Rather expressing sympathy or sending condolence, how can you just shout on the patient? While doing that, are you acting responsibly? What a person should be speaking at that time, in my view,

"It is okay dear, take care"

"it happens, dont worry, everything gonna be alright"

And if you can't speak these words, I suggest you to keep your mouth SHUT. I understand the frustration of elders. They are also sad and worried about whatever has happened. But these things can be communicated later on. But NO. they start showing the rights of being elder or being in a good position.

The person who spoke such words for my brother, smokes and is an alcoholic. When that person drinks and drives, does he act responsibly? He is amongst those people who are responsible for his current situation. The victim is not always in fault.

I don't deny that the victim should not be scolded. He should be advised or scolded by elders at right time. Sometimes, such a major incident in life changes the person entirely. Give some time and hope for the changes.

Once milk is spilt, the first thing you would do is to clean the floor. You just can't sit crying over spilt milk